you don't need to apologize for anything

Speaking up when someone has hurt us in some way. Have you ever apologized for something on this list? But by doing this, we’re undermining ourselves and reinforcing a sense of guilt and subservience. What’s one thing you’ve realized you don’t need to apologize for? Below is a short list of the ones I found most compelling. We should never apologize if we’re not truly sorry. Respecting your own limitations is a sign of self respect. (And How to Fix It), Why You’re Feeling Empty and How to Fill the Void, 13 Best Happiness Books For Living A Happier Life, How to Stay Motivated at Work While Working From Home, Why Constant Self-Improvement May Be Bad Sometimes, 5 Keys to Self Improvement That Will Pave a Path to Success. ~Kathy Gildersleeve Wesley, 19. 9 Ways to Take Back Your Power, How Motor Learning Can Help You Learn Effectively, 12 Ways for Any Slow Learner to Easily Speed Up Learning, 27 Best Self Improvement Books to Read No Matter How Old You Are, Why Constant Self-Improvement May Be Bad Sometimes, 5 Keys to Self Improvement That Will Pave a Path to Success, 7 Benefits of Gratitude That Will Remind You To Be Thankful Daily, How to Know Yourself and Seek Self Improvement, How to Deal With Mean People the Smart Way. You shouldn’t have to apologize for how you feel. Having worn ugly underpants or not shaving your legs. 15 Simple Ways To Make Self Improvement That Will Change Your Life, If You Think Love Is Always Uncontrollable, You Don’t Understand Love, 10 Reasons Why Growing Up Isn’t As Bad As You Think, Why The Key To Finding True Love Is Self-Love, 6 Ways to Make Progress Every Day (And Realize Your Goals), 10 Real Reasons Why Breaking Bad Habits Is So Difficult, Feeling Defeated in Life? ~Linda Leppington, 17. It's not about me. There’s a difference. Click here to read more. It’s okay that I’m insecure at times, and apologize to compensate. 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You may need to apologize for how you act on your feelings, but never for being hurt, angry, sad, etc., and expressing how you feel. 15 Simple Ways To Make Self Improvement That Will Change Your Life, If You Think Love Is Always Uncontrollable, You Don’t Understand Love, 10 Reasons Why Growing Up Isn’t As Bad As You Think, Why The Key To Finding True Love Is Self-Love, 10 Real Reasons Why Breaking Bad Habits Is So Difficult, Feeling Defeated in Life? If you cannot... 3. What Is Resilience and Why Is It Important for Success? Everything You Need to Know About Them, 7 Ways That Will Totally Screw Up Your Life, The 5 Most Important Things in Life You’ll Regret Not Pursuing, Why Does Life Suck So Bad Sometimes? You’re allowed to feel. Living life the way we choose to, regardless of fitting in with other people’s norms. ~Kay West. And sometimes we apologize for life choices we have every right to make—like the decision to change jobs, or end a relationship. There’s a difference. Click to opt-out of Google Analytics tracking. First, you should wait at least 5 or 10 seconds before you say anything, especially when you feel upset or angry. What are your thoughts of an older woman sleeping with a much younger man? 1. ~NathanArisa Ferree 11. ~Lisa Marie, 14. The content on Tiny Buddha is designed to support, not replace, medical or psychiatric treatment. ~Tanya Johns Emery, 9. It's ours. ~Bonnie Romano, 2. It’s human to struggle, and unless we’re hurting other people, there’s no need to apologize for it. ~Michelle Galyon-Stallings, 8. ~Olga Baez Rivera, 5. Celebrate the fact that you are able to love. Your stories and your wisdom are just as meaningful as mine. ~Jennifer Werner Mader, 7. The New Lifehacking #7 – Why You Should Be Open to New Stuff, But Wary About Using It, 10 Good Habits to Have in Life to Be More Successful, How to Become Goal Oriented and Achieve More in Life, Symptoms Of Low Self-Esteem And The Root Causes of It, What These 11 Colors of Urine Reveal About Your Health, Introvert or Extrovert? And it’s understandable, given my background, that I occasionally blame myself for things that aren’t my fault. Being a free thinker and questioning everything even when it’s not the popular thing to do. Choosing what you think is best for your life. ~NathanArisa Ferree, 11. Having to grieve. More than 2,000 people responded, many with variations of the same ideas. This site is not intended to provide and does not constitute medical, legal, or other professional advice. The whole point of learning to apologize less is to build confidence in ourselves and our choices, and that means embracing our humanity. Quality “me” time (taking care of ourselves). You Should Never Apologize for Saying No “You shouldn’t apologize for getting “overly-emotional” — especially when your emotions are totally appropriate for the situation…”. All Rights Reserved. You Should Never Apologize for Loving Someone Being upset about something. And what I wrote might seem a little ironic, considering the topic of this post. No one should be made to feel guilty for trying to better themselves. Making decisions about your own future that don’t do any harm to anyone. It could take a lifetime to accept someone we love passing away. It’s okay that I sometimes experience anxiety about potential rejection. Sometimes we apologize for things beyond our control—like bad weather during a party we’re hosting. You shouldn’t have to apologize for how you feel. Trusting your instincts, even if you can’t explain it. We may also apologize because we’re highly sensitive to other people’s feelings, and we want to ensure we haven’t unintentionally caused them pain. You may need to apologize for how you act on your feelings, but never for being hurt, angry, sad, etc., and expressing how you feel. This way, you will prevent yourself from saying anything that you will regret. It ain’t always pleasant, but better to know what’s really in someone’s heart than be fake! Sometimes we apologize when someone else was actually in the wrong—when a waiter brings us food not cooked to our specifications, for example. Being sensitive. 1. Yes, I just quoted myself there. Before using the site, please read our Privacy Policy and Terms of Use. If you’re anything like me, you apologize far too often, and most of the time, when you haven’t done anything wrong. There are many people in... 2. ~Nath Ray, 6. She’s also the author of Tiny Buddha’s Gratitude Journal and other books and co-founder of Recreate Your Life Story, an online course that helps you let go of the past and live a life you love. ~Christina Teresa, 18. I had a wonderful relationship that suddenly ended…Please help. ~Kiran Sohi, 15. ~Rebecca Killeen, 10. (And How to Fix It), Why You’re Feeling Empty and How to Fill the Void, 13 Best Happiness Books For Living A Happier Life, How to Stay Motivated at Work While Working From Home, Why Constant Self-Improvement May Be Bad Sometimes, 5 Keys to Self Improvement That Will Pave a Path to Success. It’s admirable to apologize when we’ve genuinely done something wrong, or even if we believe we inadvertently hurt someone else. I don’t believe in apologizing because someone ‘demands’ an apology. How to Stop Obsessing Over What Other People Think of You, How to Stop Over-Apologizing, From a Lifelong Over-Apologizer, 14 Daily Happiness Habits to Adopt Right Now, How to Set Healthy Boundaries and Protect Your Space and Energy, How to Make Sense of the Anxiety That Comes with Being a Parent. Since this topic has been on my mind lately, I decided to ask Tiny Buddha Facebook followers this question a couple weeks back: What’s one thing we should never apologize for? For being protective of our children and trusting our instincts as parents—especially when they’re not yet capable of advocating for themselves. Particularly if you were abused at some point, it can feel imperative to express remorse for potential slights and offenses, since this could minimize the risk of retaliation. Taking a break and doing absolutely nothing for ten minutes. Lori Deschene is the founder of Tiny Buddha. All Rights Reserved.

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